...but you know you'll be with Him.
Not a lot of pictures in this one...just words that need to be heard.
I wanted to share this post from some special friends of ours.
I asked Scott for permission to share because I think Frances' words must be shared.
She's facing what I'm probably most afraid of....
Dying and leaving behind her husband and children.
We met Scott and Frances & their girls through the adoption of our daughter Selah.
Scott was our lawyer and he was a great lawyer.
But--when we were up at the hospital and Selah was dying, they became our forever friends.
The morning of her death, Scott had the county courts cleared, pushed through our adoption finalization and had Selah's finalized adoption certificate delivered up to our hospital room about an hour before she died.
She had been our baby from the beginning.
No doubt about that...
But, for some reason, to have those moments to hold her...
Fully, legally, our child--
It just meant so much.
Scott and Frances know pain.
They know the kind of pain that sucks all air from your lungs.
In 2005--their little daughter Rebekah started a battle with inoperable cancer.
In 2007--their house burned down.
In 2009--Frances ("mommy") was diagnosed with the terminal disease ALS.
Their words carry weight.
Their faith carries weight.
They've never pretended it has been easy.
They haven't given for-show-answers, smudging away the pain and sorrow.
No--they've wept pain and sorrow...
They've writhed in pain and sorrow...
In that silent-screaming-place where the wrenching hurt is so deep it's beyond sound.
But in the midst of it all--they've turned to God.
They've "poured out their hearts to Him" (Psalm 62:8).
For their full story--please visit Rebekah's Page...
But--if you have a few minutes--please take time to read these words below...
from a mama, wife and follower of Christ--
who will meet Him face to face before the end of the month.
Sunday July, 10, 2011
From Scott:
We have been absent from the blog. Absent because it was hard to share what we were feeling. Absent because we have not known what or how to share. Over the next few days we will try and catch you up. And probably, though no promises, bring you on the last steps of this journey with us. Right now we will jump back about a week. As Frances was coming to terms with her thoughts, she wrote the following around the end of June. As you read this, keep in mind that she writes with a computer controlled by her eyes, clicking on each letter individually by blinking. A LOT of thought and time went into this. Hopefully it will help you understand how she came to this decision. Hopefully it will help you:
From France:
I spend a lot of time thinking about my life and my death. I am in a weird place. The only reason that I am alive is because of life support machines. I am secure in my faith. There was a time in college when I accepted Christ's death on the cross and the blood he shed as an atonement for my sin and I asked the Holy Spirit into my heart to work within me to guide me in the ways of God. I know that when my earthly body dies, I will be with Jesus and that will be in heaven. I can in effect choose when I want this body to die and get a new pain free body in heaven. But that is a difficult choice to make. There is a kind of constant turmoil in my heart and in my mind. When have I given my family enough of me? When have I endured enough pain? When is my job here on earth finished? What else do I need to do? What other life do I need to touch? When is the time that Jesus is calling me home?
I grieve over the milestones and such that the girls will not have Mommy with them. I wonder who will take my place when they get married, since no one is supposed to be seated after the mother of the bride has been seated and who will determine when to stand and when to sit since the people follow the mother of the bride. I wonder if I have passed this nasty disease's gene to either of my girls. And if so will there be a cure before they are diagnosed with it. And will they choose to be tested for the gene mutation before deciding to have children of their own.
Often it seems that the girls only come in to see me when they are told to and the adults only when they have to. Meanwhile the world and in many ways my family continues to go on with their lives. How much am I holding them back by continuing to live? At what point am I being a disservice?
So often I am left to my own thoughts and so often my eyes well up with tears and I can do nothing about it on my own.
Some of you may be wondering how I can be so sure. Let me tell you. I believe in the Bible and I see it as truth, I see it as applicable today and for many tomorrows.
"Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him." John 3:36 (NIV) I do believe in Jesus Christ, God's son, therefore I will have eternal life.
"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house there are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am." John 14:1-3 (NIV) Jesus has promised that he is making a place for me in heaven. What a wonderful thing to contemplate!
"Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to be children of God - children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God." John 1:12-13 (NIV) God is my father, but he does not take the place of my earthly father and they can both be called Daddy. Wow!
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV) When I trust in Jesus he will show me which way to go. There have been many times that he has guided me and at least once save my life. Quite a few years ago when we lived in Ohio, we took a trip to Watkins Glen, New York on our motorcycles for a rally. It was a long drive mostly on freeways and the last thirty miles or so on twisty backroads. Scott liked to take the twisty roads a little faster than I, so would be a little ahead of me. As I was driving through the corners, I started to feel that something was wrong with the shock. I might have figured that we could look at it when we got to camp where we knew there would be a repair shop, but i could tell that God was telling me that I needed to stop quickly to see what the problem was. So I told Scott that something was wrong and I needed to stop and check it out. He found a nice gravel lot and stopped and in a few minutes I pulled up next to him and turned the bike off. As soon as I got off the bike and took weight off the bike the bike fell onto the back wheel and the shock fell to the ground. The eye bolts were still connected to the bike but the main part of the shock was sheered off at both ends. Had I not stopped, it could have come out and probably caused me to crash and injured me or killed me. I thank God for his guidance.
"This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved him, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another." 1 John 4:9-11 (NIV) God loved me well before I was even born. I try to follow Christ's example by loving those around me. I am not perfect and do not always do the things I am supposed to do. Most importantly Christ took all of my sins on himself when he died on the cross. He paid the penalty for my sins. There is no greater love than that.
You may find this amazing; God loves you no matter how many sins you have committed or how long you have turned your back on him or how unworthy you feel. If you believe in Christ and the sacrifice he made on the cross for you and for me, then you can ask Jesus to be with you and ask him to forgive you for your sins and thank him for paying the price for your sins and ask the Holy Spirit to come into your heart to guide you for the rest of your life.
Here is a simple prayer that you may use. "Dear Heavenly Father, I believe in your Son Jesus Christ. I am thankful for him having paid the price for my sins on the cross. Please send the Holy Spirit to dwell in my heart to guide me. I love you God. Amen" If you have said that prayer, the best way to get to know God is by reading his word, the Bible (I would start with Matthew), and attending a church regularly. Tell any Christian friends about your commitment to God and let them be excited with you. May you find peace from your Heavenly Father and joy for a lifetime of learning about God and his promises.
If this has made a difference in your life, we would love to hear about it! Following are some additional verses that are meaningful to me.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV)
Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him. John 3:36 (NIV)
Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21 (NIV)
Now it is God who makes both us and you stand firm in Christ. He anointed us, set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in us as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come. 2 Corinthians 1:21-22 (NIV)
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest, if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9 (NIV)
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 (NIV)
Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Luke 6:37-38 (NIV)
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV)
From Kara:
Dear Frances,
I read this last night...and wept (for you, for Scott, for the girls)...went to sleep thinking about your words...I've started this twice now...writing to you...trying to figure out what to say.
I know after Selah's death, that it's important to say something...
So, I want you to know--
--how much your words have touched my heart.
--how much your life points to Christ.
--how much your faith in Heaven and eternity encourages me, emboldens me.
--how seeing you face one of my greatest fears (leaving kiddos/husband) with honesty and pain...but trust in God...hits a place so deep within.
Our kiddos ask about you and Scott and the girls at least once a week and you have a special place on our board of people we pray for.
In part--because of our history together (your family--Scott in particular--was so used by God in our lives when Selah was dying).
In part--because I think every one of us mentally travels down this "what-if" road....and to see someone cling to God, even when it's beyond-words-hard...to see someone say with assurance:
"I will be with Him."
Well--that is such a gift--
Your words of faith.
This is not our home.
Praying for you this morning.
And you have my promise to continue...
I'm thinking of the reality now.
You will see Selah soon.
You will see Jesus soon.
Oh--Frances...
Just know how much your words here honor God.
He already has used your words and life to touch many hearts.
With Love,
Kara (for all The Chuppies)
Selah
For God alone,
O my soul,
wait in silence,
for my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress;
I shall not be shaken.
On God rests my salvation and my glory;
my mighty rock,
my refuge is God.
Trust in Him at all time, O people;
pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us.
Selah
~Psalm 62: 5-8
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