Waxed Eyebrows and Who I Want to Please

*photo source

I walked into their room--
Full of waxed eyebrows.
Jewels glittered and boots shined with
Degrees and big dollars,
High brows and arched collars.
And they asked me--
"What do you do?"
And I said,
I'm a mom.

But then qualified sideways
With comments of past days--
Of-teaching-and-travel,
And "I do have my Masters"...
And "I still do some writing"...
And--
I realized my concern was what they thought,
Not His thoughts, but--
them.
Pleasing men over Him.

*photo source

I checked out my numbers,
Those stats I care not for--
And saw in the tally
A decrease by some four.
Four people offended or not measured up to,
And I worried and wondered
And gave too much thought to
Their gavel of judgment and
Realized my heart was too weighted on--
them.
Pleasing men over Him.

My child was distracting.
And while in clear rebellion,

She required intervention and loving correction,
But, if I'm quite honest,
Deep-down-heartful-honest,
I saw in her defiance,

*photo source

My concern was reflection,
And reputation protection.
My concern was more--
them.
Pleasing men over Him.

And in humility I say now--
Forgive me for caring...
For seeking,
For searching,
For giving,
For trading,
Too much for their pleasing...
For wanting too deeply,
For bowing too sweetly,
For cowering too meekly,
To them...

Pleasing men--
Over You.
Over Your heart.
And Your eyes,

*photo source

For missing--
Your treasure,
Your pleasure.
Your measure...
While--
Pleasing men.

So I lay it down now...
This desire to please.
I lay it down now,
At the foot of Your cross.
My heart seeks for your smile,
Your glance of approval.
Over them.
Over theirs.
Over all other others,
I seek You.
I seek Him,
Over them.

"...for they loved the approval of men

rather than the approval of God."

~John 12:43

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